Bane of my existence

So I recently got an Iphone. Hurray, right? Wrong. It is useful and I love it but like all good things it comes with a catch. The dreaded autocorrect. Iphones have a built in dictionary and word correction software that checks your spelling and changes your words accordingly. I don't know all the details behind it but it is annoying. On more than one occasion it have autocorrected "K" to "Klingon." What.

String me up with a wireless reciever

You know what I find quite annoying. Everyone who finds it annoying that the Public wireless network is so slow when they in fact are the key problem. Well, indirectly. When a person connects their phone to the public network here at the High School it saves that connection as the place to connect the next time they come in. It happens automatically. The only way for it to not to happen is to go into your settings and tell it not to do that. So there are, as I'm told, roughly 800 students who attend this school. I;d say that at least 500 hundred of them have phone that connect to the wireless Internet. That is why it is so slow. Futile to explain because it doesn't sink in. That's my rant for the day. Have a wonderful rest of your day.

Miseries of the flamboyant phlegm throat.

Being sick for three days really has a way of putting things into perspective. I am a 5th year senior and as such I am going through the motions of attending classes and graduating. Having eight classes this year as every year I find that any other year, if I was sick for more than a day, I'd be panicking and sending out texts to find out what my class had done that day. This year that isn't the case. I have four art classes. If you miss an art class there is no worrying. You just come in and work a little harder on your project so you do not fall behind. I then have a Library Aide position. Missing that class has absolutely no ill effects. The only way for it to be detrimental in any way would be to miss quite a bit of that class. Say, a month. I then have an English Tutor position. Honestly missing one of these classes gives me a slight amount of grief seeing as the teacher need her aides to be doing tasks that improve his or her class session. This also might be attributed to that I believe that English is my best subject and that I frankly love it. Another of my classes is my Comp class. It actually is Composition in the Digital age but who has time to say that in full all the time so I just call it my Comp class. It may not be exactly extremely easy but it is not in fact monumentally hard either. I truly like it. Not because of the discussions we get into in the class but the fact that it is English at its finest. Freedom. We have the freedom to write whatever we want and post it for the world to see. Finally all that is left is my Anatomy class and that class seems to be a breeze. I have a wonderful teacher and the material sticks with me and... yeah. Enough of this ranting. Moral of this story: daytime television is evil.

Continuation

So this post is going to be a continuation of my last post. Revamping the story so that it is not so chaotic and is a little more structured. The same rules apply as before. No Backspace and no going back. Time to take the plunge into Oblivion.

     As Elize laid on the back counter she felt a feeling of fullness. Not because she had just consumed an entire human being but because she was content with her life. She looked up at the class around her and found herself being stared at by the population of her homeroom. They all appeared horrified. Had they actually seen her devour Bonlaquecha? Why wasn't her glaze working on them. Being completely perplexed all she could let out was a *slightly* menacing burp. The class erupted in screams of terror as they all rushed out the door leaving Elize by her lonesome. "This is not good," Elize thought. "I better get out of here before..." Just then the fire alarm went off. Shrieking bells deafened all other sound as Elize sprang to her feet. "How am I going to get out of here?" At this point in time Elize reasoned that she was in fact a Dragon and could just bust through the wall, and that is exactly what she did. As Elize tore through the plasture and rebar that made up the wall she found herself terrified at the thought of what might be lurking on the other side. Breaking through to the other side she found herself on the back end of the school. All was quiet if you didn't count the alarm going off. Running down the street she realized she had nowhere to go. The school knew where she lived and would probably be sending the cops there when they found out that she had left without signing out of the office. An epiphany struck her as she past a Taco Bell. Draco. The dragon that she had met at that party last month. She remembered thinking that that is the most cliche name for a dragon but at this point she didn't care. Getting into high gear she sprinted off towards Draco house. The only thought on her mind being how did she know where he lived.

As Elize reached Draco's house she suddenly regretted coming here. He had pink flamingos in his front yard. They would know that she was here. Everyone knew that plastic flamingos were a dragons favorite thing, like, ever. She shrugged off the idea and knocked on the door. Moments went by. No response. A few moments more. Nothing. Screw it. She opened the door and entered.

To be continued

So how was that. Still completely random but I like it. What did you think of it? Leave me a comment.

Backspace frustration

     So I find when I am writing that my backspace key gets a workout. Not your average, oh I'll just run on the treadmill for a little while and maybe do some push ups. No. More like I'm gonna run 10 miles while learning to play the tuba. If you have never played the tuba then you probably will not understand. Shame, but that isn't the point. I go back when I'm writing and change so many things and usually when the final product come out it isn't what I intended. So this post is going to go away from all that. I'm going to write a free hand story. Forbidding myself from using the backspace. No going back and changing anything. This also means that I might make a few grammatical mistakes that I can't fix. Enjoy.

     There once was a girl. Her name was Elize and she was the youngest child in her family. Elize's family knew that she was special, but no one could have imagined that she was really a dragon. When Elize was born, out of the fires of mount likatralaba (pronounced Like-a-tra-la-ba) her parents knew that she wasn't human. They knew she was a dragon but they didn't care. They didn't discriminate against dragons. Dragons are people too; or rather they can pretend to be. Elize's skin was jet black. Her ears were pointed at the end and she smelled of coconut. With her reptilian eyes she could charm anyone into believing anything. Mostly she just made people believe that she was a normal all American teenage girl though. This is Elize's story. As Elize walked into school thta day she felt as if something was amiss. The air tasted like the way that you feel after you get a D on your math test. Yeah, just like that. She walked into her homeroom class and put her homework, only slightly charred this time, into the bin on her teachers desk and then proceeded to take her seat. Her seat was more of her reclining on the back counter but thanks to her fabulous dragon eyes no one noticed. As Elize chewed on her notebook her best friend, Bonlaquecha (pronounced Bon-la-qwee-sha) strode up and began crying and sobbing. Elize never understood human emotion. Mostly because she was a dragon and couldn't understand English though. Bonlaquecha was going on about her losing her favorite lip gloss on the bus this morning when she was trying to stealthily dodge a hot dog vendor who was out just a little to early and for some reason was on the bus?? Elize knew some english but only enough to understand how to ask how to go to bathroom and how to order Chinese food. All she understood from Bonlaquecha's blabbering was that she, quote, "I... want... to... go... get... low....main..." Elize, an avid chinese food lover eagerly accepted and then she ate Bonlaquecha. Did I mention that Bonlaquecha was chinese?

The End

    So I have no idea how that turned out. I kind of like it because I love randomness but I don't know how it went. Tell me what you thought.

Pigasus For President!!!

       While scanning the internet for information on this upcoming Presidential election I came across an odd Wikipedia article that told of the grand Presidential nominee, in August of 1968, of Pigasus. I do not know the complete history of Pigasus but here is the wiki page that I found. If you have a moment and want to read something in history that is kinda outlandish then maybe this is for you. If not maybe you'll enjoy this picture of a rainbow narwhal that has a floating piece of pizza.

Souvenirs for the damned

           So humor me. What if one day you are walking down a trail through the woods. Singing songs to yourself and generally having a good time when you break through the tree line and  come upon a lake. Pristine, cool, and crystal clear. You are mesmerized by the sight of this natural water feature when you notice that there is a small black aquatic something or another moving along under the surface. You start getting an idea as to what it may be. A fish? Possibly. A otter. Maybe. A shark? What are you smoking? You creep closer to the lake and you begin to make out what this mysterious mystery is. You do not believe your eyes. It is an eyeball. roughly the size of a softball......... But it has fins. You then wake up in your bed, completely perplexed. As you look up at the stars above you wonder, "where the hell is my ceiling?"